Sometimes an individual’s failure to understand emotions leads them to misperceive the motives of other people. This story illustrates what happens in such a circumstance.
The Story: Charles and Erik
After the firm closed down the mutual fund that Charles was to manage, he decided to pursue a start-up fund on his own. The guy who had hired him and later fired him, Erik, was running his own independent fund, which was fully financed. Charles decided to go ahead with his new venture fund, and his “pal” Erik indicated that he would assist Charles in his efforts. In fact, Charles reported, Erik was willing to travel with him to Tokyo to help with the negotiations with a Japanese investment firm to obtain seed financing for Charles’s fund.
When asked about the agenda for the trip, Charles indicated that Erik would also be discussing his own fund—one that had been started months earlier and had $200 million raised already. The Tokyo bank was supposed to be a major backer of Erik’s fund.
The Emotionally Intelligent Manager Analysis
Erik is very happy with the situation and does not feel that anything is amiss. It’s Charles who is the client and the focus of the emotional intelligence plan.
Charles gleaned critical information about the situation by attending to Erik’s emotions. Next, Charles needed to determine what these feelings meant for Erik and how they affected him ).
Charles is in a tough place. Erik is focusing on his own needs and goals, and he may view Charles as a distraction. Charles is in a very uncertain and tenuous position, whereas Erik is happily moving forward. Attempting to understand emotions.
If happiness is Erik’s key feeling, and if it indeed will continue or intensify, Charles needs to plan around that fact. Including the data from emotions, even though it makes him feel uncomfortable, is what Charles must now do, leveraging his ability to manage emotions .
A Plan for the Emotionally Intelligent Manager
Charles was a “nice guy.” Such a description is usually a positive thing to say about a person. In this case, however, being nice meant that Charles was a bit naive and too trusting of people.
As a nice guy, Charles found it very difficult to see the bad in people. He knew there were bad people out there, and he was well aware that people can lie, cheat, and steal. But he took people at their word and at face value. If Erik said he was anxious and eager to help Charles, then Charles believed that Erik truly meant it.
Charles can try to feel and understand Erik’s point of view. Charles realizes that he and Erik are on a different page, in terms of their business plan but emotionally speaking as well.
Charles informed Erik that he was going to attend the first meeting in Tokyo and that he wanted to schedule a final session with the Japanese investors, without Erik. Charles also decided to pursue his own fund, independent of Erik, since he felt that Erik was focused on his own interests and would really not have the time or energy to expend on helping Charles.
The Outcome and Lessons Learned
Charles and Erik visited Tokyo together, and Erik attended the first, and last, meeting with Charles, despite Charles’s efforts.
However, aware that Erik may have a different agenda, Charles stayed on his toes, observed Erik more closely, and represented his own fund with the investors. He didn’t allow Erik to be his spokesperson.
Erik was somewhat annoyed with Charles, but he did not interfere with Charles’s new agenda. The investors provided Charles with the requested start-up funds. Erik seemed a bit less comfortable with Charles afterwards. Charles felt bad about this later but came to see the change in Erik being due to Erik’s heightened respect for Charles based on Charles’ understanding of and leveraging the data in feelings.